Friday, October 15, 2010

Week 31

I apologize in advance. This post isn't going to be witty, or funny, it's going to be a good ol' fashion complain fest. When I said last week that Nolen was sleeping through the night I must have knocked on particle board instead of wood. It was just a 3 day fluke. I'm still not drinking coffee in the afternoon, and we're still not sleeping. He's waking up 2-3 times a night. I am EXHAUSTED. I came *this close* to throwing in the towel on nursing. I thought if I could just get a break sometime, whether it was a night feeding or just an afternoon one. If I could just have 30 minutes to myself, no students, no baby, nothing.

These sleepless nights are catching up to me. It's the combination of sleepless nights and a full time job. I don't know how people do it, it's wearing me down. The first few months of school I was running on adrenalin, that adrenalin is gone. I go to bed by 9, back up at 2-3am, up again from 4-5am, and up for the day at 6. Leave for work at 7, home by 5. Spend time with Nolen until 7 (play, eat, bath, bed.) Then do it all over again the next day.

I DREAM of the day when I can just stay home and raise my family, the day I can put 100% of me into my family. Unfortunately that's just not in the cards right now. One day...

Ahh...that felt good (thank you for listening)...moving on...

In happier news we took Nolen to his very first pumpkin patch to celebrate his very first Halloween! Not quite sure he understood the whole 'pumpkin patch,' but he did pick out his own pumpkin, a Nolen sized one! Love, love, love!


  1. Don't worry it'll get better. He's just trying to get more milk production. He's probably going through a growth sprut. Try putting him in the bed with you. He's big enough now that you won't be able to roll over on him. Trust me, as someone who just finished nursing and working full time, this will help with the sanity! With him in the bed with you, all you will have to do is roll over and nurse. You can go to sleep while he nurses. He'll wake you up if he wants more. This will also help to build your milk production. If you can get an extra pump in during work, that would help too! But I understand if you can't, I'm a teacher too!

    Good luck and don't give up! It really does get better...remember this is just a small time in your life! It won't be long before he won't want anything to do with you...

  2. nursing in bed=more sleep=awesome

  3. Love these adorable photographs of him at the pumpkin patch...and his little spiky hair!

  4. I completely understand. Being a working mom and having a baby is the pits; it just plain stinks, but we do what we have to do for our family. There are days where I am so tired at work, I just want to lay on the floor in front of my coworkers and nap. But it will get better.

    I know letting him cry it out may seem horrible, but you may have to do it. I had to do it a few nights with Easton and he has now slept through the night for a month. Also, one thing that really helped was I turned the monitor down some. I found that if I didn't hear every little peep he was making I wouldn't wake up as much and he also learned to soothe himself back to sleep. It will get better, I promise!